Hello folks. Willa K here -- welcome to my Backwoods Guide to NYC, a site devoted exclusively to my adventures in the glorious borough that is Queens and beyond. This all started the other day when we AstoriaGirls got to talking, and realized we spent pretty much all of last summer walking the streets of Queens. Not in the carnal, Spitzerly-loving way, but in the literal walking kind of way, trekking from Broadway to Ditmars Blvd., looping around to Steinway, meandering down to the River and back again. Because when you’re broke and you’re single, walking is pretty much the cheapest form of entertainment you have ‘round these parts. Not only are there troves of hidden cultural wonderment just begging to be discovered, but all kinds of crazy people and places, not to mention some hardcore window-shopping. Plus, it generally passes the time you could be spending clubbing or dining in swanky bistros, only you don’t have boyfriends or sugardaddies or governors willing to bust out their campaign funding. Walking around Astoria is really the next best thing.

You may find yourself asking, just who are these AstoriaGirls? The truth is you’ve probably seen us at one time or another, roaming the streets of our beloved borough, walking Marble the British Dog, championne of class and taste, and generally stopping traffic with our wily, wandering ways. We’re three chicks from three different states all starting with M, which generally implies we grew up in the sticks or the dirty south. Hence all this walking experience. It’s what we non-native New Yorkers know best. But being an AstoriaGirl is much more than that. It's a state of mind. An ethos, if you will. Our only requirements? Streetsmarts, curiosity, and an unrepentant love of Queens. Which may lead you to ask, Why Astoria? Why now? Honestly, Queens gets a bad rap. It’s widely regarded that in the pecking order of boroughs, mighty Manhattan trumps all, with trendytown Brooklyn coming in a close second, followed by the Bronx ‘cuz it’s home to the Yanks’ Evil Empire. Then there’s Staten Island, but let’s face it, no one really counts Staten Island as a borough, anyway. It’s like Long Island, only worse. That leaves us with lowly Queens. I see how you city people spit the word out with distaste: Queens. The ugliest borough of the NY Fivefecta. Queens. That desolate expanse of concrete and bodegas. Queens. The only thing at the end of the wretched 7 line. Queens. Home to that creepy metal globe and the flying saucers you only know exist because you saw “Men in Black.” Yeah, Queens. The place gives you automatic street cred. You can’t deny it.

But here I am rambling on and on about Q-town, when all I really want to talk about is Astoria, the most glorious neighborhood of all, for so many reasons and on so many levels. What other ‘hood has its own theme song? Many fail to realize that the “N-N-Notorious!” hook off the Born Again album has origins steeped in Queenslore. [Ass-TOHR- ee-ah!] Biggie may have grown up in Bed-Sty, but he left his heart in A-land. Urban legend has it he and Tupac live off of Ditmars somewhere. Not only that, but according to the US Census, Queens is the most ethnically diverse borough in existence, which I largely credit to hoodlette’s like ours. Greeks, South Americans, Czechs, Indians, Puerto Ricans, Koreans, Dutch, Mexicans, Laotians, Pakistanis, Central Americans, Russians, African Americans, Irishmen, Egyptians, Canadians, wannabe actors, starving artists, people from states that start with M – we got ‘em all here. And aside from a few pockets of cultural mono-conformity, we’re all mixed in together, eternally bound by small salaries and an affinity for wide open spaces.

I could go on and on extolling the virtues of this illustrious region, except then there’d be no reason for this site. Yes, you guessed it! Each week, the AstoriaGirls will explore another nook of this amazing city, for better or disastrously worse, and share our findings with all you sheltered, Manhattan types. I’d also like to point out that, while we may be unabashedly biased, the AstoriaGirls are NOT prejudiced. We realize that by presuming you'll go soooooo out of your way as to cross the East River, it would only be hypocritical to ignore the other four boroughs of this fine city. We assure you there will be plenty of “Excursions” and shout-outs to the outside establishments who truly deserve it. We are also not above calling out those that happen to suck monkeyballs. This weekend marks the advent of our travels, so stay tuned!!

- Willa K

P.S. Please feel free to send suggestions, queries or general musings. We’ll take it all, as long as its Queens-related or halfway entertaining.